Not sharing your expectations can ruin your relationship


It’s an oft-mentioned adage that communication is key to maintaining a healthy relationship. And this does not refer to a romantic relationship alone. In any relationship, the key to keeping it healthy is to be open and vocal about your thoughts and feelings so that there are fewer misunderstandings.

Many a times, in a relationship, you might have certain expectations from your partner, or you may be expecting your partner to react a certain way, or treat you a certain way. But if you don’t come right out and say what you want or what you expect from your partner it can lead to resentment piling up and a lot of misunderstandings.

Relationship experts talk about what is wrong with unspoken expectations in a relationship.

  • It’s not always good to let actions speak louder than words. You might be doing more than needed for your partner and your family assuming they will do the same for you. But unless you say it, it might snowball into a problem as it will leave you feeling ill-used and unloved.
  • When your expectations that you have not voiced are nor fulfilled by the other person, you experience a crushing sense of disappointment and then unreasonably this leads to arguments
  • Your partner is left feeling on edge and walking on eggshells as they have no idea what went wrong or why you are upset.
  • Over time, not talking it out and not explaining your expectations clearly will lead to a communication gap and with time it gets even more difficult to bridge that gap.

Here’s how you can eliminate unspoken expectations:

  • Speak to your partner. Even if you can’t articulate what you are actually feeling, just tell him/her how you are feeling and what you are thinking.
  • Instead of overthinking a situation, and using that as a reason to not talk, focus on the positives and at all times, keep communication channels open. Don’t hesitate to talk to your partner.
  • Write down what you want to say, as it will make it easier to say what you have to. Also, set aside time each week, if not every day to talk to your partner, even if it is only 10 minutes.


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here