Bollywood star Sanjay Dutts daughter Trishala Dutt has penned an emotional note to mark one year of her boyfriend’s death on Thursday. She opened up about going for therapy and quitting her job post his demise.
Trishala took to Instagram, where she shared a picture of herself along with her late boyfriend.
“Today marks 1 year since the ground beneath me seemed to crumble and my life changed. I’ve done a lot of grief work –from talk therapy, to joining specific support groups and being more intentional with how and who I spend my time with.
“I’ve also been somewhat absent from social media over the past year. Losing my mom at the age of eight and working through that for over two decades, surprisingly, did not prepare me for loosing this beautiful soul,” she wrote.
“It’s not just the passage of time, you don’t get over it or move on just because a year or twenty go by. You have to face the darkest moments and ride out the rollercoaster of emotions for the rest of your life. I knew grief wasn’t only sadness, however, I’d forgotten it creeps up in the sneakiest of ways.”
Trishala shared that in the past year she cried to a point where she ran out of tears.
“I had to quit my job because how could I take care of someone’s mental health if my own was a disaster?” she wrote.
She shared that she had several “public breakdowns where strangers have come up to me and asked if I needed any assistance.”
Trishla added that she ate “everything in sight and gained 30 lbs (13 kilos).”
“But it’s fine. It happens. Its the process, and it’s nothing I can’t fix once I’m in the right mind-set (and I’m happy to share my mental health and physique has gotten so much better!)
“Also, I’m not ashamed to admit it’s because of an amazing therapist, support groups, and 3 beautiful friends.”
She shared that she still has things that reminds her of him.
“I have text messages and handwritten notes. I still have his toothbrush, listen to some of his favorite songs/artists, and have his T-shirt that smells just like him. I’m beyond grateful for the time we had together. He lived his life boldly, out loud, and took advantage of each and every day authentically. He was the utmost gentleman who always made me feel safe.”
“He made me laugh and loved to joke around. He was kind, gentle, thoughtful, and always chose to put me first. He was helpful, supportive, and a great listener. He trusted me, took good care of me, and took great care of my heart.”
Trishala shared that her boyfriend respected her, never judged her and welcomed her into his family.
“He never left my side, never EVER let me go to bed upset, or left me wondering where I stood in his life. He made sure to let me and everyone else know that I was his entire heart every.second of every.day.”
To Trishala he was magic.
“It was a joy to be a part of his life. He will always be apart of my journey, and my story. My memories are all I have left of him, and I will never ever forget him. I’m half a heart without him, but even with that, I still and will always be and feel like the luckiest girl in the entire world to have been his…as he was mine. October 07, 1986 – July 02, 2019.”
Trishala’s verified profile has over 477K followers. She is Sanjay Dutt’s eldest child, from the late Richa Sharma.